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Imagine trying to knock down a brick wall by pounding your head against it. Literally. You finally realize that it's not exactly the smartest idea in the world. So you quit.
What?! You quit? But quitters never win, and winners never quit, right? They (the infamous They) have been telling you that for you whole life! So it must be right, right?
WRONG! Winners quit all right... but they know when and why to quit. There is a time for everything, including ceasing to put your energy into unproductive and downright futile efforts. Then you can put that energy into something more productive, or at least fun.
(Mind you, there's also a time for sticking it out, and slogging through the tough times. Conventional wisdom isn't always wrong!)
In the specific case of knocking down a wall, after you bandage your wounds and get some painkillers, and maybe an X-ray, you can go get a sledge hammer, or a crane with a wrecking ball. (Or hire someone to do it for you. You don't have to do everything yourself.) Or you might decide you really didn't need to knock that wall down after all, and go watch a movie or read a book or play a game or whatever you do for fun. Maybe some tennis practice... against that brick wall.
Back to the real world, though, there are all sorts of situations you can apply this to. Your job. Keeping up with the Joneses. This month's governmental "War on a Vague Concept". Whatever. Leave a comment below, to tell us (me and the other readers, assuming there are any) what brick wall you've been banging your head against... and what you intend to do instead, now that you know it's okay to quit.
Don't fall for it, unless of course it's a true emergency. That means, something not only unforeseen, but unforeseeable. It's a manager's job to plan for the things likely to go wrong, allow slack time for them, and recovery time afterward.
If you give in, even once, you set a precedent. The boss now knows he can count on you to work your buns off, probably for little to no recognition (let alone actual reward), on a whim. He will expect you to do it. If you don't do it next time, you are "not meeting expectations". Never mind that the expectations are utterly unreasonable.
There is an old military expression about this: "Take more than your share of objectives, and you will be given more than your share of objectives to take."
It can be tempting, as so many short-sighted companies pay all glory and homage to the fire-fighters, but slight the diligent workers practicing fire-prevention. In the programming world, this shows up as support for, for instance, 80-hour weeks of debugging, versus 40-hour weeks that include good unit test coverage.
Repeat after me: "Your lack of planning, does not constitute my emergency."
Okay, putting it that bluntly may not play well with the boss, but if you get fired for sticking up for yourself, well, would you want to work for such a jerk anyway? (By the way, one of the first jobs I ever quit, I quit partly because the boss was a jerk.)
Boss: I need this report ASAP! You: Sure, boss, I'll get right on it. (You cancel your lunch plans, work work work, and crank out a report.) You: Hey, boss, I just finished the report! Had to skip my lunch plans, but I got it done ASAP, just like you said! Boss: Uh, thanks, put it in my in-basket. (Time passes.) (You find out he didn't really need it quite as fast as his tone implied.)
Okay, you can be excused for doing that once. But what about next time? Wouldn't you be much happier, and your boss just as happy as before, if it went more like this:
Boss: I need this report ASAP! (You recall your 12-1 lunch plans, estimate the report will take one to two hours, and do the math.) You: Will, say, 3:00 be okay? Boss: Uh, yeah, sure. (You have lunch with your buddies as planned.) (You come back and do the report, finishing at 2:45.) You: Hey, boss, here's your report! Boss: Fifteen minutes early, and it looks nice! Great job!
Okay, sometimes it won't quite work out that way, but more like:
Boss: I need this report ASAP! (You recall your 12-1 lunch plans, estimate the report will take one to two hours, and do the math.) You: Will, say, 3:00 be okay? Boss: No, I need it by 1:30! You: Okay, I'll get right on it! (You cancel your lunch plans, and rush out a report, giving it to the boss at 1:29.)
Is that really any worse than the first scenario? No, in fact it's better, because now you have a much better idea of exactly when the boss needs the report, and therefore how much time you can spend on it. Since he stated a time, chances are, he really did need it by then. (If not, and he does this a lot, find a new boss. That's a whole 'nother exciting episode of Dare to Excel.)
So where's the "excelling" in this, you may wonder? There are two pieces.
First, you are exercising the skill of time management! Okay, maybe having lunch with your buddies wasn't terribly important, but it's what you planned to do, and you're finding a way to stick to your plan. This may involve honoring important commitments (another important aspect of excellence); maybe your buddies were counting on you to bring the birthday cake for the one of them that's only in town for the day and you all haven't seen for years.
Second, your lunch plans may have been something a bit more important than just lunch. Maybe you were attending a seminar, or some other self-improvement. I see this a lot from certain individuals in my lunchtime Toastmasters club. It would help them, and the rest of the club, if they would stand up for themselves, ask the boss when the report is due (or whether they can hold the meeting after 1:00 or whatever), and Dare to Excel!
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One way to Dare to Excel, is to try something new. Not just your first bite of sushi, but a new way of doing something, such as a new programming language.
At work, my current project is trying a few new techniques. At the meetings introducing these, there was no objection voiced. However, one person told the manager much later, that he was very opposed. It may even have been a factor in his decision to leave the company. Another person now claims not to have time to learn these new techniques.
Actual opposition after careful consideration, and lack of time, may be reality in these cases. However, frequently such reasons are simply masks for fear. (Or for laziness, but that's a whole 'nother story.)
The familiar routine can be comforting, even if you know that it is not accomplishing the desired results. The prospect of changing your ways can be daunting.
But there's a word for people who won't try something new. In fact, there are many words for them.
The kindest of these is "conservative", though in this case taken to an extreme, as in, "stick-in-the-mud, conservative fuddy-duddy". (And no, I don't mean the political type of conservative, aka "right-wing", as opposed to "liberal" or "left-wing". I refer to the older definition, "conserving of existing institutions", or "cautious in making changes".)
When it comes to your career, though, the most appropriate word that springs to my mind is: "obsolete".
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